Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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