if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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