Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
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