Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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