...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
