Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
of course. lets lasso hookers.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
