Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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