me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
