You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
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