Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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