worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
