i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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