Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
My feet surprised me
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
