Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
