Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
