we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
