Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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