you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize