U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
