Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
