sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
one might say we're banned from that church
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize