I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
