Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I've blown a few things in my day
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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