i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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