whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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