STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize