I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize