So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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