We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I want her autograph on my taint
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
