Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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