he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
