if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
