That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
