if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize