Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
