People in love make me want to vomit
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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