When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
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