I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
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You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
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Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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