Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
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