tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
