i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize
