Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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