he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
