I am spending my child support on dildos
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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