Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
