Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
