You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
