At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
