I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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