i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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