took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
