Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
