gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
